If I have to explain and convince you of the merits of a swashbucking adventure of a Mummy reimagining, then I don’t think we can be friends. Therefore, I’ll assume that I don’t have to explain or convince you of anything, dear friend. The spoiler-filled review awaits.
If we told you this was a slasher movie we would be lying, so we won’t. This Clive Barker movie throws a sprinkle of slasher onto an all out monster vs people battle and tries to build a mythos akin to Star Wars in the process. Does it succeed in sweeping glory or is it all basically the cantina scene? Click through to find out.
We should really just start watching movies for the site that will make Jack cry. It's fun to berate him for things. Spring will do that to you, with its genre-bending horror romance conceit. But this is a horror website, and we want to assess whether it's able to serve up as many scares as tears. Take the jump to find out how well it does on that front.
This is a Troma movie. Troma is a production house that makes incredibly childish low budget movies full of poop jokes and other blue humor. In this case, they made a movie about a haunted knockoff KFC franchise. If any of that sounds appealing then you can watch the entire thing online for free. If you’re on the fence and would like to see what we thought about it, click through to the review.
The Monster Squad is a time machine that will take you back to when monsters were cool, bullies were proper bullies, every group of friends had a fat kid, and movies were summarized with hip hop recaps. Want a movie that is a quotable masterpiece and will be objectively perfect at your next Halloween party? Check out the review to see if this checks all the boxes.
John Dies at the End is a 2012 horror-y, comedy-y, sci-fi-y, psychological-y, completely bananas movie about too many things to sum it up succinctly. We sure are good a this huh? Just click through and read our review, and all your questions will be answered. Or maybe not, but we'll have fun together!
So you guys. Look. We watched this weird movie none of us had ever heard of because we had trouble finding a Mexican horror movie to watch for Cinco de Mayo. It was a wild ride you should go on with us. Then you should tell us by Twitter or in the comments what movie we should have watched for the holiday.